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life

ok guys im about to post about everything loll just read it :) hope you enjoy.

life.
when i was young, i thought i will be so happy, and have a lot of friends.
well, i used to, but not anymore.
for me, life is like a sky. sometimes its rain, sometimes its bright.
but now, the sky of my life is raining. hahah

i never ever thought i'd be like this, never expect it, never imagine it.
and did you also know that every 7 years, cell in our bodies changed? so every 7 years, we are a new people. and i kinda miss my past.
the memories. sometimes it hurts to flashback, because i know everything will never be as it used to, and i really wish i could go back. but i cant.

the friends, the laugh, the joke, the silly conversation, the tears, the pain, the love, everything. i miss that. i miss my old life. everything is different now, and i hate that.

and honestly i dont know what i'll do with my life. only go to school, private course, eat, sleep, breath. i spend my time, like its the same and nothings changed. but when i look back, everythings changed. its weird, isnt it?

the i miss you feelings.
do you ever miss someone, that it hurts inside? cause you dont know if those person misses you too, or forget you. do you ever miss someone, but that person doesnt exist anymore?
its kinda like, they've changed. so you dont know who they are now and you really miss the old them.
sometimes im confused about 'feelings' and 'love'.
its just, idk. i never understand life. i never understand feelings. i never understand love.

and sometimes im just tired of having feelings, because i can feel pain, hurt, insecure, and anything worse.

❤ "life" was Posted On: Friday, 28 September 2012 @08:14 | 0 lovely comments ✿

'friends'

im still bored so i want to post something again hahah.

friends. do you have friends? i bet you have a lot.

me? of course i have a lot too.

friends is just friends, you know, nothing special.

but about best friend, do you have it?

me? hmm.. i still dont know, maybe i dont have it (?)

Best friend is someone who will always be there for you, always understand you, always care, never want to see you sad, will do anything to make you feel better, will always listen and will always know if you're sad, even if you didnt say anything.

for me best friend is like that,.

if best friend is like that, i dont think i have a best friend.

but i used to have one, she is perfect to me, and also, she is the only one i can talk to about everything.

but now? she left.

yeah, thats life. people changed. people left. feelings fade.

i've been trying like its ok but you know its never easy for me.

i thought me and her will never ever ever ever ever apart, but the truth is, we are.

maybe its not her fault, maybe it was my fault. and maybe it will always be my fault. idk.

im sorry everything changed.

and honestly idk if i can find someone again who can truly understand me like she did..

okay okay im so dramatic now hahahahahah nevermind, ok?

and what about you? you have a best friend? if you have one, you're so lucky, not like me.

maybe i just havent found it yet. maybe later i will find someone again who will always be there for me..

but right now i cant handle if anyone left me again, this year, a lot of people had left.

and honestly i dont know how to trust people again. but you know, i still trust her.

and now i am telling you everything ._. joke not everything so i'll stop before i tell you everything ahahahah okay bye :) #ignorethispost

❤ "'friends'" was Posted @08:03 | 0 lovely comments ✿

Fantasy.

hey guys i am bored so i want to post about something.
fantasy. what do you think about that?
well i think fantasy is amazing, because you can imagine things you wish you did or you wish you were there.
fantasy is also thoughts in mind, isnt it? or imagine.
and i've been thinking of forest. i've been thinking of sitting in the forest, surround with a lot of old tree, many grass, alone, its just seem so peaceful you know. i like it.
and i also imagine about being an actress and stop school hahah i know its not gonna happens but so what if i want to imagine it? at least i have dreams.
and i also imagine about being pretty. i mean, who doesnt want to be pretty??
and i also imagine about going to paris and london and france and england, its a romantic city, a classy city. i always want to live there, maybe i'd be so happy. but i also know if i live there, it must cost a lot.
and i also imagine about moving to australia or america, i want to school in there but my mom wont let me because right now, im still too young, she said.

vintage girl. vintage photography. sky. anything beautiful. i love it.
life is beautiful, but why i still cant feel it? i just imagine it. in my mind.
i really wish i could go to all those places. and never come back to here. hmm..

❤ "Fantasy." was Posted @07:53 | 0 lovely comments ✿

yayy

hello everyone, sorry i havent post anything in a while. i was so busy.
but today i am free yay im so happy my middle test has finished! xD
I kinda worried about the results because you know, my math and physics, and also biology, and also other lessons. but i know God will give me the best.
And finally i've finished my tik's homework. so im just gonna take a rest, a long rest with this life. hahah.

but, monday is school again :( ugh im lazy.
dear school, y u no give us a holiday!?

and also, i want to graduate faster please please please cause i dont belong in that class im always alone k. but i dont mind being alone anymore..

hmm and, i've been thinking about where will i go to high school, and maybe, mahatma gandhi school, what do you think about that? because maybe at collage i want to school in other country, so i need to adaptation in international school.

and btw, i've been searching a video about hair tutorial in youtube and i found a lot, i really want my hair to be cute like those girls, but im not good at braid or anything to do with hair xo. i love braid, because its simple and kinda cute, even if its 'old fashioned'? but i dont think so. and also i love curly hair, my hair isnt straight but isnt too curly too so its kinda asdfghjkl. hahah idk i also love high buns, its really cool and simple but also, i cant do that with my hair, yet.

and about the clothes. its been a long time since i went to forever 21 and i want to check out the clothes, but if i check it i would love it and want to buy it and i dont have money lol. i'd like to shopping right now.

k bye :)

❤ "yayy" was Posted @07:43 | 0 lovely comments ✿

its friday night!

hey guys how are you, sorry i didnt post anything yesterday, i was busy and tired.
next week is gonna be a battle so maybe i'll absent posting a post hahah.

today is like usual, i just chilling every friday night. i thought that this night i will study for the exam, but yeah, im lazy to study again, so maybe tomorrow.

btw, anyone knows what's hipster? i bet most of you know it. and yes, i love hipster because the clothes and style are so cool and its only for teenagers. i've been buying hipster clothes, and now im kinda broken, my wallet is almost empty ahaha, so maybe i wont buy anything for this time.

next week after i finish my exam, maybe i will go to a mall with my friends. maybe we'll watch a movie, resident evil of course, i havent watch it -- and maybe we'll check out the forever 21 and maybe i will want it again, but i wont buy it, because it is expensive haha.

now it's supposed to be my skype time with my friend, pw. but she is offline, i've told her to online skype, she said yes, but you know she's kinda confusing and asdfgjkl. lol

okok bye :)

❤ "its friday night! " was Posted On: Friday, 21 September 2012 @08:09 | 0 lovely comments ✿

asdfghjkl

hey guys how are you?
finally, tomorrow is a free day for me, but still, i need to study and have to go to the piano course. friday will be a middle exam --
today in my all lesson course i dont study anything because im not in the mood, so i was just talking with my friends. we talked about a lot of things hahaha.

i was listening to a music and it is really describe how i feel these days :

"Do you ever feel like breaking down?

Do you ever feel out of place?

Like somehow you just don't belong

And no one understands you

Do you ever wanna runaway?

Do you lock yourself in your room?

With the radio on turned up so loud

That no one hears you screaming"

umm, maybe tonight i will sleep over. i will just laying in bed and think. about everything.

and i will fall asleep, naturally.

next week is gonna be a battle between me and exam hahah, i want to have a good score, i will study hard this time. i wont make my parent disappointed with my score, but the only problem is.. physics and math :( and also english, im not really good at speaking english, you can see it by my post in this blog, i bet my grammar is messed up :x hahah but it will get better :)

k thanks for reading bye Gbu :)

❤ "asdfghjkl" was Posted On: Wednesday, 19 September 2012 @08:28 | 0 lovely comments ✿

Lazy Monday

Hey guys these days has been good for me.
Today i think i can do the exam.
And btw i will add one more html in my tik's homework about the illuminati.
Cant wait to present it, cause i love to talk about it. Maybe later i'll post about the illuminati, just want to let ya guys know haha.
And yes, tomorrow i dont even have a homework or exam so yeah i am so happy, no need to study :D
But, tomorrow i have an english project about comunities, im a but nervous :/

And i failed my physics again :( i know i cant..

But i dont really think about it, whatever will be, it will be.
And im so blessed today and yesterday2, i hope you guys too! Thanks God :)

And what's up with you? :D

❤ "Lazy Monday" was Posted On: Monday, 17 September 2012 @08:11 | 0 lovely comments ✿

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